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the word crisis is made up of two ideograms.
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The first meaning danger,
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Our way of perceiving and dealing with conflict will make
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it either a destructive experience or a constructive one.
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Let's observe together how conflict can be an opportunity for everyone
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if we use it to enrich our perspectives
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to develop our emotional intelligence
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and to increase cooperation.
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How to enrich perspectives through conflict.
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If we've got to the point of conflict,
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it's because the other person's perception has not been fully received.
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The divergence of interests of values or opinions has led to a standoff.
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and it's generated negative emotions.
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There is still time to take a step back,
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to breathe calmly and.
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To really listen without judging the other's point of view.
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Open up and enrich yourself.
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You don't have to give up what you believe in.
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You just have to expand it,
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as the 19th century American philosopher Emerson said,
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it's a joy to meet someone who has a different opinion than mine.
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It's the only way I can learn something new.
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if we leave a discussion without having broadened our perspective,
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the discussion was a waste of time.
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There is no progress and innovation without different opinions,
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without disagreements.
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and generational diversity of the corporate world
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forces us to be open.
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Without openness,
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conflicts will only multiply.
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Constructive opponents are the best guarantors of
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the continuous improvement of a service.
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If you have employees who are always agreeing and always going in your direction,
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you're heading straight to a wall.
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and intelligently mobilize opponents
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so they can enrich your department.
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conflict is also an opportunity to enrich your emotional intelligence.
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Conflict is an opportunity to develop awareness of
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our emotions and the emotions of others,
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and the impact of our communication and our actions on each other.
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Dealing with conflict requires working on overcoming the fears that,
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make us not dare to say no.
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Overcoming the need for approval
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that makes criticism unbearable for us.
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Overcoming the need to always be right in front of others
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all throughout these conflicts we learn to master the
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emotions that fuel or even ignite the conflict anger,
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Developing your emotional intelligence means above all
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learning not to let yourself get manipulated and blinded by your own emotions.
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We will avoid getting on our high horse when the
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person in front of us starts yelling or insulting.
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We will reframe the discussion without drama and moodiness.
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We will learn to maintain self-control,
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and respect for others,
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even in the middle of arguments.
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we will acquire this emotional intelligence
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if we learn from our past conflicts.
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Instead of seeing ourselves as victims,
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we take responsibility.
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I am equally responsible for the conflict.
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I am responsible for my communication.
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I am responsible for my emotions.
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It is also up to me to come up with satisfactory solutions for everyone.
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If the same conflict reoccurs,
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it's because we did not quite grasp the lesson
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and the wisdom from the previous conflict.
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We did not reap all of the fruits of this experience.
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We want more of it.
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conflict can be a wonderful opportunity to
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enhance cooperation and make relationships grow.
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the American relationship expert,
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observed that the happiest couples,
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those who succeed and build together,
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are not the ones who experience the least conflict.
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They are the ones who know how to recover from conflict as quickly as possible,
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how to enrich themselves through it
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without getting to the point of no return.
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Seeking to avoid conflict through denial,
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through the unspoken
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It may not be externalized,
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but the tension is latent
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even more destructive.
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If we greet conflict with an open mind,
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daring to express dissatisfaction,
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it would not be a threat,
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but an opportunity to grow in the relationship.
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successful couple learns to love one another
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even in what disrupts their own needs and beliefs.
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John Gotman explains that most conflicts are in fact insoluble
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because they are due to differences in personality
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and values that are not always transformable.
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Can we cooperate with people having different values?
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I coached two young associates who had created their consulting firm.
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They blamed each other for their way of addressing and negotiating with clients.
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Their revenues were stagnating.
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They could have chosen to separate due to their incompatibility,
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they chose the option of coaching to cooperate better.
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They divided the clients and the roles during negotiations,
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allowing the other one to speak without contradicting them.
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Their value systems still clash sometimes,
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but their turnover has increased rapidly.
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Is conflict an opportunity?
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If the people involved take responsibility for it and use it
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to broaden their perspectives,
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develop their emotional intelligence,
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and improve their relationships.
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